Posted by The WORD in other words (2009) by Fr. Noel Rebancos, SVD – Divine Word College of Legazpi
Feast of Saint Thomas, the Apostle – July 3
After spending 25 years in the foreign mission, I decided to return to the Philippines in 2005. The Central Province welcomed me with open arms and assigned me to one of our colleges. In 2007, I had the chance to visit again my former place of work. Friends whom I´ve met received me happily, while others who were told that I was around received the news sceptically and remarked: Unless we see him in carne y hueso (flesh and bone), we can´t believe you. To believe that I was around, my other friends needed first to see me with their own eyes.
Thomas, called Didymus, manifested the same reaction of doubt when he was told by the other disciples that they had seen the Lord. His answer was: “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands and put my finger into the nailmarks and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.” (John 20,25) Thomas was indeed full of doubt that he demanded concrete proofs before he could believe. At this point Thomas put more importance on his senses than his deep conviction to believe. Hence, the term doubting Thomas.
It is not only Thomas that had doubts in life. Even the other disciples had doubts too. We also have to face doubts and uncertainties in our day-to-day living. Doubts become part and parcel of our human and spiritual lives.
When Thomas expressed his doubt openly, it is considered as one of the most honest statements of doubt in the Scripture. Thomas could not keep to himself what he was thinking and feeling; he had to verbalize his doubt as honestly as possible. For him it was important that his companions should know what he had in his heart.
The gospel captures not only the expression of Thomas’s doubt, but above all reveals one great truth: doubt leads to believing. Thomas is an example of this. For Thomas’ and many, many others, doubt is actually positive. Only by expressing his doubts and letting them “hang-out” does Thomas come to believe.
What are your doubts at this moment of your life? What is your attitude towards them? Do you consider doubt as something positive or negative? Like Thomas may we have the guts to express whatever doubt we may have in our life to Jesus. Let us tell Jesus our doubts, let Him know them. Doubt is only one step to believing. As St. Augustine reminds us: Vanish your doubts. We must not forget what God had already done to our lives.
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